Friday, October 16, 2015

Asking For Help

My friend Sarah told me in the first weeks I was a Mama these exact words:

"Now you're a Mother and Mothers have to ask for help every now and then."

She couldn't have been more right.  But it's sooooo hard to admit.  At least for me it is. I'm a Type A, get it done kind of person.  I want to do it all myself.  I want to be in control. I'm a dang engineer for heavens sake!  I'm nuts.  Ask Kevin ha!

My asking for help in motherhood began in the hospital when my Mom was holding the bucket when I was sick, Kevin was requesting more warm blankets because I couldn't stop shaking and I was texting girlfriends with "is this normal" type questions.  Heck let's be honest, this was the whole 9 months prior while pregnant!

But since this little queenie has been here, I've had to learn that I do not have control.  And I must ask for help.  First mom stayed for the first few weeks...she literally taught me how to be a mom. I had NO clue!  Now if I can be half the mom that she is to me, I'll be doing well. I'm not there yet.  I'm only 14 weeks in, not 37 years like she is with my brother.  Oh and when my parents came back to keep Molly Anne and my Dad demanded that I give him the monitor for three nights in a row so I would sleep.  Yeah that was amazingness.  

Then came my friends.  I cannot tell you how thankful I am for my girls.  There are several that have truly gone above and beyond.  I'm talking the ones that are always there for you, the ones that say I'm coming over and helping you with bedtime, the ones that send you 10 Anazon links when you ask what should be on the carseat to entertain her, the ones who don't think your nuts when you ask a silly question, the ones who tell you they're bringing dinner and don't ask, the ones who drive from Raleigh to meet your baby and drive right back, the ones who leave the sweetest blog comments and send the nicest emails, the ones who check up on you randomly.  My girls get it.  So thank you to all of you!

Ohhhh and Kevin.  Let me brag on him y'all.  He has been good at this Daddy thing.  Like really good. Yep he thought I was insane those first two weeks of hormone central, but once my mom left, he stepped up!  Big time.  As in I could not function without him.  He makes bottles, does laundry, fixes dinner, runs errands, takes care of Mills, loves on Molly Anne, gets her up and takes her to Ms. Beckys every morning.  I could keep going.  He has been so amazing. 

This week I started traveling again. Tuesday I flew up to Virginia for a few hours. I felt so far away from my people.  Then I got these pictures from Kevin. Tonight I came home from work a bit early, hung with Molly Anne, Kevin made dinner, we bathed her then put her to bed, I went to Bunco and then I came home and got in an Uber to the airport and now I'm laying in bed in Charlottesville, VA at 1am.  It's my first night away from home in a different city for work. I know I'm going to have to get used to it.  Working full time and traveling is no joke!  

I'm just thankful for my people.  I'm learning to rely on others because honestly I have no choice and I think this is good for me.  

Those are my deep thoughts for this fine Friday. Cheers!


April of A. Liz Adventures said...

From someone who has seen you every week or two in person with that delightful MA, I can tell you that you are doing a marvelous job at mothering. :) Now, you know you can't show me three photos of that delicious tummy without making me want to blow raspberries right on my phone screen... right?!?! Safe travels home, see you in a few days!

Adelyn V said...

First, LOVE these pics of your sweetie-how adorable!! Second, being a mom is hard. I also had trouble asking for help but it was so great when I finally let myself do that. I struggled with post partum anxiety and admitting that and letting my good girlfriends "in" was super positive for me as well. I also travel for my job and it IS hard--no way around that--but it does become more "routine" as time goes on. Keep doing you--she is just darling!

Heather Lenox said...

Being a mother is hard work! Sounds like you have a great support system with family and friends! 💗💗

Tess said...

Loved this. So much to be grateful for. Enjoy your weekend back with your fan, I'm sure they missed you like crazy!

Ally Harding said...

Thanks for your advice last night! What would we do without friends and our support systems? You're doing awesome with Molly Anne! Have a great weekend!
Ally - Life as I know it

Leslie said...

This is such great advice and so true! Molly Anne looks absolutely adorable too with her pink polka dots. You are doing such a great job. Hope you get home soon, even though I love Charlottesville!

Megan said...

You're doing so great! Next time you're in Charlottesville let me know-I'd love to reach out and connect if your schedule allows!

Laura Darling said...

That's great that you have so much support! It sounds like you're doing a great job!!